Wait…June 15, 2009? That date was the last time I daggerfished this blog. Like, 16 years has passed. How?!? How did this happen? Have I really spent the last decade and a half being tooooo busyyyy to blog?? It’s not like I’m a rich, daring adventurer with money to spend physically sailing ships into Bombay or taking helicopters up mountains to ski avalanches. I’m not stranded on a deserted island, though there are days I wouldn’t mind. Just some days, hours even. Mostly I just lounge around the house trying to avoid socializing in person. The Internet is a Godsend (Dogsend) for people like me because we never need to brush our hair or put on pants in order to make a nuisance of ourselves online. Which makes it even more puzzling. I literally have the Internet at my fingertips but couldn’t daggerfish blog. Wth.
I’m going to go out on a limb and say it’s my ADHD, but honestly, hell if I know. I see the link to this blog every day on my FB page, but it clearly hasn’t entered my mind to post on it. To be fair, I do have the one track mind of a working sight hound in that everything else blurs around me except for my prey…err, I mean my daily goals. As the years have passed, those goals have become much simpler and easier to manage. Until bam, I wake up one beautiful spring day and What The Hell have I been doing for 16 years that I can’t even wedge an occasional word into an Internet blog?
It’s not quite as bad as waking up from a coma, but still mind boggling. Sixteen years. My body has become all soggy and plouffy, and my brain is wilting and tilted slightly to the left, my nose can’t smell anything and my eyes are no longer the beautiful, glowing, deep green orbs of a top tier carnivore racing across fields of gold beneath a promising sky. Nay. I stubbed my toe getting up this morning and can barely digest meat without guzzling Pepto Bismol. Ugh.
Obviously a lot of time has passed and a fucktillion things have happened since 2009. But instead of cramming 16 years into a paragraph or two, I’ll just mention any relevant points as I continue onwards. But this beautiful midmorning it’s just going to be all about getting a snack and then taking a nap 🤣 Perhaps my newly found brain will allow some deep, critical thinking and planification. Or muffins.
Either, or.
