Yes, friends. Another Endless Commute and I.
Tuesday night, a drive that should normally take 20 minutes has sapped yet still more of my life force away..an hour and a half’s worth. At this rate, I could be dead by spring. What’s going on out there? Doesn’t anyone know how to drive? Sure, the Volvo owners can. And the Beemer-ers, and Mer-Caddys. Their cars practically drive themselves.
A true test of driving ability is to put someone into a beat up piece of shit Ford with el crappo winter tires, (they were on sale! watch me slide!) and let them hit the highway. Guaranteed this clown will be personally responsible for the ten mile long backlog of ranting, raving, foaming-at-the-mouth drivers who are paying thru the nose for thoroughbred automobiles. Automobiles with winter tires that can handle snow and ice like they’re one with the road, like they're glued, nailed, railed. Only to crawl along at the speed of fuckin reverse as some dumbass tries to keep his POS on the road and not go skidding off into pedestrianland and chalk up a few Kill points.
Ha. Reminds me of that scene in Office Space, where the traffic goes slower than the old man with the walker.
Listen, people…if you can’t afford good winter tires, take the goddamn bus. You thoughtless, inconsiderate, goatfucking road whores. I don't much care what you drive...just drive the damn thing already.
And get outta my way.
Because, yes...I do own the road.
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